Billy's Last Kiss (Blogophila 52.12)

As the flowered bus rattled down the road, Kari made a vain attempt to tame her curls. The witch image stared back from the mirror. Accurate, not that she advertised it. She rarely went to the Coven or associated with most of them. To the outside world, she was an old hippie selling jewelry at craft shows. Nonetheless, she had spiritual power, the gift of transition and healing. Something she did not take lightly, especially this one. It wasn’t often she serviced herself.

*****

She couldn’t remember how old she was when Billy McCormack moved across the street, thirteen or fourteen tops. It had begun innocently enough. He would tease her about her wild hair, calling her Witchy or Hag. She would get mad and tickle him until he begged for mercy. Something about him drew her like a fly to a light. They became inseparable as spring rolled into summer. Holding hands, they walked to the playground to climb the ladders or to the woods to explore. It was a dream.

The nightmare came the week before school started back. His mom was at work and hers was drunk as usual. They were on their own. It was too hot for normal clothes and they played in the backyard in their swimsuits, playing cards and chasing each other with the hose. They talked about going naked, but they were scared of being caught. About noon, they took a break and Kari went to her house to fix them some lunch.

They ate and stretched out on a towel to dry off. They talked about school starting and who their teachers might be. The conversation moved on to each other. Kari kissed him and he ran his hand through the wet, frizzy hair. It felt wonderful. Giggling, she tickled him and grinned as he tried to pull away. But something inside of him snapped. He reached between her breasts and pulled her top. The loose knots gave from her neck. The cool breeze felt soothing against her skin, but look in his eyes scared her. She tried to reach for him, but he had her pinned to the ground. The memory faded into pressure, pain, and tears.

She never saw him again. They were evicted from the house the next week and left no forwarding address. What hurt wasn’t the loss of her virginity, it was him running away from what was done.


*****

She had thought about him often since then. In her mind, she had forgiven him long ago. In fact, she celebrated it because it taught her about the true nature of people. Most were cowards and scared of the consequences of their actions. It was useful when it was time to help someone over to the other side. Show them there is healing, but don’t get too close or personal and you won’t get hurt.

The call came from the Hospice Nurse. Billy had requested to see her. They had only reconnected recently and all he knew was she made jewelry. They never spoke about the rape and he never told her about his cancer. She decided to wear the dress she had on now, a simple black one with a high collar and mid-length skirt. Looser than a widows dress, but appropriate for the duty. She didn’t put on the lipstick right away. She needed something from him first.

At the hospital, fear overtook him as she took the seat next to him. Darkness was coming and he wanted to untie his burdens.

“Oh, Lady in black, give me your hand” The grip was surprisingly strong.

They talked at length over their childhood and subsequent lives and regrets. His mom had died not long after they moved and he had moved with an uncle. He was gone now, too. She asked about women and the answer surprised her. There had been no other than her and he lived alone. He asked about why she never married, but she dodged the question.

Catching his breath, the words eked out.

“Can I ask something?”

Kari smiled and kissed his cheek. “Sweetheart, you have three wishes.”

The silence held for a bit as Kari stroked the bony fingers. His eyes closed for a moment, but it wasn’t time. The confession needed to be spoken. Words she needed to hear.

“My first wish is to admit I sinned, against you and God. I raped a girl many years ago. She was funny, with red curly hair. My friends said she was a witch and I knew she was. But one of the good kind who builds you up and strives to make you a better person. My own base desires banished the goodness away. I left you crying and naked on the ground. I ran because I knew I had taken something sacred. I know I can’t repair the damage. I wish to acknowledge my part in your downfall.”

The request floated away like a balloon and tears came to Kari’s eyes.

“It wasn’t my downfall, Billy. I only wish you had stayed.”

The comfort in these words was light to his soul.

“My second wish is to beg your forgiveness.”

Kari placed his hand on her heart. “I forgive you with all my heart, Billy. I did many years ago. It may have been horrible and I was angry for a long time. It made me who I am and I love you for it.”

She felt her own soul mend and this burden of her past lifted from her shoulders as the tears fell onto his chest. The last request was the one she had been called for.

“And finally, I wish to kiss her deeply and with all of my love before I depart this earth.”

He lay back after this final request, chest jumping and falling unevenly. It was time. The lipstick was in her bag. As she put it on, she asked her final questions.

“Who is your foe, Billy?”

He was silent for a moment.

“The need in other men. I wanted to be the first of my friends to love and it ended up being my last.

“What was this woman’s name you defiled?” Kari asked softly.

“Kari Summers.” The words struggled to get out.

He looked at her in terror as she leaned in close for he could smell the bitter almond. Softly, she put her lips against his and Jacob’s Ladder opened in front of his eyes.

“It was, it is, and it will be to come.” She held him as he climbed, resisting the urge for a last tickle. “I love you, Billy and it’s time for you to come home.”

All was still when she rose from his bed.


*****

She pulled in behind the hearse. It was the coda to their lost youth. A tarnished silver sky made a perfect background, 25 chairs lined up under the tent in front of a foldable pulpit. The mourners drifted in one by one, an older cousin, a couple of co-workers. There would be empty seats. Not unusual. No one had come to see him in the final days except the cousin and he had been forced to deal with it by the other members of the family. Kari had only met him that night in the hospital. He had been kind enough to ask her to come to the service. It wasn’t normal. But he may not have known what the true purpose was. She took her seat and smoothed out the long black dress.

She looked up and noticed the cousin conferring with a Rent-a-Pastor. Too far to eavesdrop, but they were probably working on the fake eulogy. Words designed to assuage the guilt of the living while paying lip service to the dead. But the dead were beyond caring. And, frankly, so was she.


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Topic-Tyler Myrth

The lyric "Who is your foe?, The need in other men." is from The Lady in Black.

Pic-David Scharder

Pic guesses: Ladders (in blog), Jacob's Ladder (in blog), blue sky, rust, rungs, climb (in blog), playground (in blog)