A.G.E's Joint

Hey, Heidy and Howdy! It's your favorite randy dandy DJ Harry here with a brand new program. You see, the Suits that run Old Farts are a little worried. You folks, our demographic not only are bargain hunters, but are dying out in alarming numbers. So, to perk you up and get the Geritol Generation back on their feet, tonight it will be all classic commercials. After all, you deserve a break... To have it your way You know where the beef is. And who will buy you a drink So give a wink And enjoy the rest of your day.

Hey, Heidy and Howdy! It's your old pal, Harry Handy, the randy dandy DJ  here on WOFT, Old Farts Radio, the jumping jukebox for the Geritol generations. We used to say "Don't trust anybody over 30." Now , it's "Everyone is half my age!" I've been off the air for a while. Got involved a little legal kerfuffle with my second ex concerning running with scissors. It sounded something like this... Yeah. pretty bad and a sharp object lesson for sure. And now a word from our sponsor. Yes, that is Betty White when she was young and sexy. Now, she's old and...old And so are we. Remember when our theme song was: Especially after finally hitting the home run? She insisted on cuddling and watching the stars when all you wanted to do was get something to eat. Well, we know how that went. But you have to say she turned out to be the spitting image of her mother. And now your daughter is fighting that same breeze from down under h...

Hey, Heidy, and Howdy.   It’s me.   Harry Handy, your randy, dandy online DJ back again here at WOFT.   That’s right Old Farts radio, where the only thing older is Abe Vigoda.    And guess what, gang?   It’s Senior Citizen day here at the Fart.   We give you a 10% discount for listening and everyone on the play list is a certifiable Medicare recipient. It’s hard to believe all the great musicians of the 1960’s are now late night infomercial fodder, but they are.   Whether you are on the throne struggling with that Ducolax dose, or in the garden with the petunias, sit back and enjoy the show. Wait, I understand we have a special request from fellow Oldies DJ Myke.   Seems he can’t remember what he played last.   Maybe my list will help him through his moment.     First up is the ultimate Rock and Roll senior.   He’s changed the game two or three times in his career and still puts on quite a stage show ...

Hey, Heidy and Howdy!  I am your intrepid DJ, Harry Handy coming to you live from "Catch a Falling Star."  The night club for the has beens and never weres. The club is serving something called a "Ben Gay" at half price.  The bartender won't tell me what's in it.  As always, this Old Farts program is brought to you by Ensure, nutrition when nothing tastes good; and by Eggo Waffles, providing breakfast for good ol' Harry for two generations.  We are here, as always,  to celebrate our past, for better or worse. (In the case of my second marriage, much worse) A lot has been said for bands from the '60's, '70's and '80's that continue to tour long past their prime.  How a lot of them are but shadow's of their former selves.  One of those great band is Lynyrd Skynyrd.  The unluckiest band in the business.  Thirty five years ago, the band literally went up in smoke and the ashes have been performing ever since.  Anyway, here is ...

“Ah, there you are.   I didn’t think you’d come today.   It does an old man good to see young people now and again. When you are the oldest sailor on the dock, you never know if you’ll get another chance.   You did bring the beer?   Good. ” “Your mother well, I trust?   You know her and I go back many years.   When I first met her, she was about your age and I was still bit older.   I was working down on the docks and she was a waitress in a diner.   I’d get off and have a bit of supper.   I didn’t have a girl then.   I had lost mine to fever a few years earlier" “Anyway, your mother would serve up me up stew and beer.   I always wanted to ask her out, but never could get up the nerve.    She was a pretty one, back then.   Then I caught mate’s position on a steamer and left town for a while.   It was about a year and half later I was back.   By then she had left the diner and gotten mar...

Hey, Heidy and Howdy! It’s a bright, beautiful morning here on WOFT, Old Fart’s Radio.   I’m Harry Handy, your randy dandy radio host.   Have you had your Metamucil today?   Here, we spin songs so old; they really should be science experiments.   Moldy, goldy and straight from the bottom of the remainder bin at the record store, just like my audience.   Somebody asked me if I knew Ben Gay.   Knew him?   I watched him being born. Yeah, that was scraping the bottom of the barrel.      We welcome a new affiliate here to our ancient tunes network, the ladies of the Group Blogging Experience.   And are they experienced!   I understand we have a couple actual Woodstock veterans in the group.   That was a long time and many substances ago.   They have run the gamut of friends, others, children and grandchildren.   In honor of those folks, I have some special tunes planned. Like this one. ...