The Phone Call (Blogophilia 48.12)

Rrrring
Willkomen, Bienvenue and Welcome. This is Devil’s Quill Communications, the finest in Human Quality Control. My name is M.C. How may I help you?
Oh, you like the Caberet reference, Mr. Bowles? I’m so glad. Yes, I have your records on my screen now. It says your wife is named Sally and she left you for a writer. We have our sources, Sir. Did we make disease and can we transfer it to Sally? I’m afraid not, Sir. This is intake and we don’t handle those types of requests. If you like, I can transfer you to our Get Even division when we finish. Maybe they could make her a Stripper or something. Cross checking her records, she would make a good show.
You want to join our organization as a Convincer? We don’t get direct requests like this often. How did you hear about us? Oh, yes. Jim Baaker IS one of our best sponsors. I’m so glad for the feedback. Yes, it was sad about Tammy Faye, but she got the promotion she was looking for.
Back to your original request, may I ask what your background is? City Councilman and State Legislator for the last 25 years. A stint being a front man for a chemical group. Rock and Roll promoter in your early days? You certainly meet our minimum requirements. Can you tell me a time you deceived your constituents? Introduced a bill to create a park, with a provision sell the land to a logging company on page six? Not bad. You also wrote a music contract that took all the money from a rock and roll band then abandoned them in the desert? That’s quality.
Do you have any violence in your background? Made a couple of groupies for the band disappear? How so? Sounds tasty. So, why didn’t your wife join them? Oh, I see. She was the cook. I can see where that would be a tender subject. Yes, I like that movie, too.
I think we have all the information we need, Sir. It has been my pleasure. There is no set processing time for these requests, but we will be back in touch before you know it. Just watch your blood pressure and you’ll know it’s us. And rest assured, we think you are Devil’s Quill material. Thanks again for thinking of DQ for all your Quality Control needs.
Good night.
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Topic-Michael Wayne Engeseth
Pic-David Schrader
Pic guesses-Front Man (in blog), Rock n’ Roll, (in blog) Concert, Old men, I’m Deaf Tour 2020, Groupies (in blog), Hair, Stacks,

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