The Morning Status Meeting (Blogophilia 5.17)

In the Devil's Quill Conference Room -Arlington VA. Marty Mammon is giving Lucious Beezelbub his weekly update before the rest of the Executive Staff gets in. "Marty. Have you received the latest report from Topside?" "Yes, Mister Beezelbub. I'm afraid it's bad news. Zuckerberg, who we have had so much hope for, is slipping in his UX and KPI metrics." "Marty, I know I'm old, but could you bring me up on the newest lingo they're using?" "Certainly. In plain language, they are initials meaning 'User Experience" and 'Key Performance Indices", or how he's turning souls into DQ converts." "Like the old 'Primrose Path' deal with virgins?" "Indeed. Our whole process is deceptive walking. We think part of the problem is Zuck and his team are trying to overautomate the process. More and more Mortals are seeing through the ruse and pushing back. We are hoping we can get him to go back to t...